Most people would think that if a friend or family member asked them to lend them money, then it would be a kind thing to do, to let them have some. However, it may not be as kind as you think as it can lead to problems in the future, so it is worth thinking things through first and discussing it carefully with them.
The first thing to consider is the amount. Is it going to be a significant amount to you that would mean that you have to go short in order to manage without the money. Could it stop you buying necessities and mean that you may have to borrow yourself in order to make ends meet. Think carefully about this as even a seemingly small amount could make a difference if you have an unexpected expense.
If you are sure that you will be able to afford it now, then think about how long you will be prepared to lend it for. You may feel you will need it back in a few months, a few years or whatever. Consider when will be the last possible date you will want it back and then make sure that you are willing to make it clear to the person borrowing it that they will need to pay it back by then. As well as being sure that this is something they will actually be able to stick to, which you may not know unless you have good knowledge of their financial situation.
It is also worth considering what effect lending money may have on your relationship with the person afterwards. It may not make any difference at all, but the chances are that it will. They will know that they owe you something and even after it is paid back they will have that feeling of gratitude that you helped them. Although that is not a bad thing, in some people they may see it as you being better than them and it could therefore cause uneasiness. It may be the other way round that the lender will always feel that the other owes them something even if it is paid back with interest. This could also cause problems. Other problems could occur if the lender needs the money back but the borrower is not able to pay them back. There may be very hard feelings between the two if this happens and it could even lead to a complete breakdown in the relationship.
Money is important to most people and not having enough can lead to a lot of stress. If the reason for not having enough is because the money was leant to someone else, then this could be a big source of stress between the two. If the lender asks for their money back and the borrower cannot pay it, then this could mean that they argue, fall out and may not find their relationship can recover.
Another potential problem could happen when you have lent money to someone as they may expect you to do it again. They may think that because you have already agreed to lend to them, that you will do it again. Of course, you may be able to do it again, but you may not have the money available and by refusing it could cause bad feelings between you. Of course not lending in the first place could also cause bad feelings, but if you explain you do not have enough to lend, this should be acceptable, but if you have lent money before, they may not think that you are being truthful when you refuse on a later occasion.
It can be really complicated, lending money. It can be wise to steer away from it completely, even if it is something that you can afford to do. It could cause problems in your relationship if you do. It can be hard though, as if it is your own children or grandchildren that are asking you will feel bad if you cannot help them. However, if you do help one of them, then you may feel that you have to be fair and help the others as well and if you have a lot that could be tricky and if they all decide to borrow from you at once, you may not be able to manage. Or you may have to turn some of them down, which could lead to bad feelings and jealousy and may not only change their views of you but perhaps to each other as well. It could break up parts of the family and no one wants that to happen. This is why it is always worth thinking really hard before you make decisions like this. It may seem like lending a bit of money may not lead to this, but money can be a very sensitive issue for a lot of people and therefore is worth a lot of consideration.
